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Love, Sex aur Dhoka

A few days back I was watching a film by the talented director Dibakar Banerjee, a film with a very unusual title Love, Sex aur Dhoka. The film is weaved around these three words with finesse. Thinking about it, these three words have a great connotation in the world that we live today, especially the India of today.


Love, the first of the three words is one of the purest form of emotions that human race has. Love is what a mother has for her child, a child who for her is the most beautiful creature on earth. Love and pride is what the father has, who sees his child growing.

Love is what propels couples into marital bliss. Love is something that binds families, communities, nations and the world in totality Love is something which is all pervasive and Universal.

But, if that is the case then what is the requirement or relevance of exclusive days that are earmarked to express love. Why do we have “Mother’s Day” or a “Father’s Day” every year, in which brazen “over” the top affection for the parents is displayed?? Don’t we love our parents the rest of the 364 days of the year??? Why “Valentines Day”?? Has love become so materialistic that it is now weighed in the form of gifts, bouquets and cards??? I would not know.

The west might have a reason to celebrate these one off days as the family binding there is too little too less, but here in India, I would still like to think that the scene is otherwise. The big Card and gift companies though are not complaining. They are laughing all the way to the banks!


Sex, hold on, before you let your imagination go wild, let me clarify what I mean by this particular word in this particular article. Sex here signifies the distorted sex ratio that India is gradually facing on account of rampant female foeticide.

India is a country that worships the Divine mother and “Shakti”, has seen the valor of queens like Rani Laxmi Bai, has had strong leaders like Indira Gandhi and has world champions like MC Marykom.

It is a cruel irony that a country in which most of the powerful political posts are held by women, examples being Pratibha Patil, the President and Commander in Chief of the Indian armed forces, Meera Kumar, speaker of the Lok Sabha, Sonia Gandhi, Chairperson of the UPA and president of the Indian National Congress and “Jaya Amma” and “Mamata Didi”, Chief Ministers of Tamil Nadu and West Bengal respectively, girl children are killed on a daily basis. If things continue this way, the day would not be far, when men of marriageable age might have to either import wives or look at members of the same sex, in despair. Some “Dostana” this!!


Dhoka or deception is something that is being practiced by Indians of all caste, creed, religion and economic class. There are cases galore, especially in areas around Udaipur, where family members of the poor have tried to usurp their land in a bid to sell them off to the land mafia.

The middle class citizen, especially in the bigger cities, more often than not, live a life of deception, a life of a nouveau rich, a life which revolves around paying of EMIs, credit cards bills and more EMIs. In fact, higher you move up the social order the more deceptions you find.

Even religions and sports have their fair share of deceptions with the various “God men” living a life of deceit and many a sportsmen taking the poor public for a ride through match fixing. But the top of the charts are our politicians, our leaders, our so called policy makers. Like frogs in the rainy season, they would swarm the masses during the election time and promise them the world, only to disappear for the next 5 years.

This deception not only costs us- the public, good governance, but also tarnishes India’s image world wide with unfathomable corruption and tales of policy paralysis resulting in the erosion of the investment environment and an abrupt end of the growth story.

So, you see the story of modern real India has all the ingredients of a reel masala blockbuster movie, Love, Sex and Dhoka, but these masalas seem to be pushing the real India back in time and eroding its brand value.

If we really are to become a country that is looked upon by the world and a superpower as envisaged by APJ Abdul Kalam, then we need to discard shameless public display of Love (remember it is a pure and private thing), rectify the skewed Sex ratio and boot out and root out the people who give “Dhoka” / deceive their family, friends, community, the country as a whole and more importantly, themselves.

PS– To all the readers who might have started reading this article by just having a look at the topic, my sincere apologies. Sorry to disappoint you, but this Dhoka was not intentional. As the article got developed and came to its logical conclusion, it happened, just like that.

3 years ago

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