The Art and Graft of Politics

The Art and Graft of Politics

Once walking down the University Road, I noticed all sorts of coaching centers which had sprung to life at every nook and corner of the city. As I pondered over all these classes, my mind began conducting its own orchestra. “Why don’t you open your own centre?” was the question. “But what will I teach?” was my response. And snap came the answer - POLITICS.

 

The Art and Graft of PoliticsOnce walking down the University Road, I noticed all sorts of coaching centers which had sprung to life at every nook and corner of the city. As I pondered over all these classes, my mind began conducting its own orchestra. “Why don’t you open your own centre?” was the question. “But what will I teach?” was my response. And snap came the answer – POLITICS.

I thought for a moment, and then it dawned upon me that who could be a better teacher of politics than our very own “aam aadmi”. And there I was a perfect example of it. After all, isn’t the aam aadmi responsible for every political move?

It was my chance to make some quick bucks. I felt a charge of energy move through my veins as I completed my course structure. I would have loved to tell you more about it but I can’t risk my business by doing so. But I will give you an insight into a few of the chapters. The first one is “WITH POWER COMES SWISS BANK ACCOUNTS”

Every person aspiring to become a successful politico, (I would have given a few examples but the secrecy pact doesn’t allow it), must know how to operate multiple benami Swiss bank accounts. Not only it is the best place to stash black money, it helps in successfully carrying out major scams as well.

This brings us to the next chapter. This involves great skill and foresight. It is titled “SCAMS TO KEEP PACE WITH INFLATION”.

Recent trend analysis of the major scandalous operations undertaken by our netas, ranging from Bofors (a mere Rs. 64 cr) to CWG (little more than Rs. 11K cr) to the raja of all scams, the 2G spectrum (just about Rs. 1.76 lakh cr), point to the fact that before planning any such feat inflationary pressures should be kept I mind. After all who wants his real income to go down?

Now I’ll let you in on the most important chapter. It can make or break a government. The favorite food for the Opposition and a toothache, I mean an eyesore for the party in power. It is “DON’T LET THE ONION MAKE YOU CRY”. Onion was responsible for the exit of a party from the Centre. It could have led to cordial relations between India and Pakistan, if the latter hadn’t blocked the imports. So now you can guess about the power of onion.

I know what you are thinking now. Where does the aam aadmi come into play? Its just huge sums of money in the netas’ pockets. Don’t you see the connection? Both the money and the pocket initially belonged to the aam aadmi. And what about now?

As a wise person once said, “It’s just a shift from aam to the khaas”.

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