Way back in the 80s, the roads in Udaipur were broad enough to accommodate ‘shaamiyanas’ or the tents during wedding season. The city was not overcrowded and people had enough adjustment capacity. Those days no one used to feel bothered with a road block because of a wedding.

It was a common sight that wedding celebrations used to be arranged on the road right outside the house of the host. With the music band playing loudly, the entire colony would rejoice with the music especially the kids since the sound was a good excuse for them and opening the school book and learning the lessons was not forced upon and blamed on the music being too loud. Also, whenever there used to be a barat procession, the entire neighbourhood could be seen by the gates trying to take a look at the groom on the “ghodi” and the flow of comments about the looks of the groom, the dresses of ladies, the funny dance steps and the not so melodious songs sung by the band-vala was unstoppable.

A conversation that would go on long used to be about the voice of the band singer. Comments regarding his good voice but desi accent were not only common then but even now the scene is still the same. “What a good voice,na? But then the accent has spoiled the lovely song, yaar.” This way the entire film industry and singers used to become hot topic for that night. The band singer’s voice made everyone remember the legendary singers…aaah!! thanks to you, Band guys…half the night would be spent singing old songs.

While all this would go on, the ladies’ comments on the attires which never knew a back seat….in fact they never will…started to flow out like a lecture given to the maid working at home. Pointing out to the one well dressed woman and recognizing her as somebody’s relative and making a note to check with her later about the outfit she wore was a very common happening. Also comments about a dress worn in the past year and the stories attached to it about spilling of a vegetable curry or some curd preparations were rolled with taste.

What was even funnier was that the looks of the bride were assumed depending upon those of the groom. For a perfect match, looks used to become another hot topic and instances faced by people with good looks in the family compared to the habits of a particular good looking person were taught as a lesson to the prospective brides and grooms in the family. Meaning “looks do not matter, character does”. This is followed even now, though the marriage alliance scene has changed a lot.

Food was always oily. The vegetables and the daal preparations used to full of oil and ghee, whereas now it is not so everywhere. Back then, oil or ghee floating on the sabji was actually seen as a sign of prosperity. Now less of it means you are prosperous and of course health conscious. Limited variety of food was served. The menu used to be almost fixed for every wedding scene viz. daal, sabji, raita, roti , poori, rice, dahi vada, papad, salad and achaar and ofcourse mithai. There was no system of long running counters for variety including chaats and continental. Chaats were never a part of the wedding menu.

Even the stage where the bride and the groom are made to sit to show off themselves to the crowd used to be a small one and no dances etc. were allowed on the stage. There was a system of being in “maryaada” on the stage and the bride and groom dancing along with the others on stage or elsewhere on the ‘jaimala’ day was totally unheard of. This was for two main reasons. One – the bride and groom should be safe by all means, they shouldn’t be getting hurt and Two- it was to show respect to the elders and be in “maryada” very specifically signifying that the bride comes from a well cultured home where such ‘acts’ do not take place in public and maintaining the privacy of one’s life is really important.

Getting back to the wedding processions, there used to be a very strict rule. No young girls were allowed to move out alone to see the procession as there were chances of eve teasing by the males in the barat and also chances of ‘buri nazar’ on the young girl if she was attractive. Phew….so much used to happen in those days.

Even now things haven’t changed much when it comes to eve-teasing. It has been happening since ages and it will continue.

My memories of the old yet golden days just got refreshed. I wish to turn more pages of the wedding albums of those 80s hoping to find some long lost friend or relative. Ciao!!