Stella got divorce recently. Her husband Billy started a new life soon with his girl friend. Stella is feeling hurt emotionally. She was a faithful wife but Billy had affairs with girls. He cheated on Stella many times. One day Stella caught him red handed with his girl friend. It was Stella’s decision to leave Billy. Now Stella is going through emotional trauma. She feels dejected and despaired. She has stopped meeting people.
I had read an article in a magazine few years back which had advised females to change their looks from head to toe to get their husbands love back. “Mera Pati har halat mein mera hai.” Females were taught to save their Mangalsutras from other women in 90s. Indian Cinema has always projected other women as cunning and home breakers. Men were shown innocent as if they were like kids and other women might do black magic and stole them from their very beautiful homely house wives. These women changed their looks and got their husbands back from other women in many Hindi movies.
It went through decades. We never portrayed good qualities of other women. We never tried to understand the root cause of failed marriages. There may be thousand reasons behind a failed marriage. Its not always the simple looks of wives that distract males all the time. Females also get indulged in extra marital affairs after compromising in current marriages. When your heart cries, you need a shoulder to cry on. Any gentleman or woman may seem to be an ointment for your open wounds.
I think moving on is a good option in a bad marriage. But making your good marriage a bad one is wrong. I am not in favour of divorce but at the same time I am not in favour of dragging a relationship which has lost it’s meaning.
Some people don’t want to leave their partners not because of love but they get scared of society’s pressure. They can’t accept rejections. It’s difficult for them to digest the fact that their marriages are not going well. They do not try to save relationships rather than they try to save marriages for their families and children.
It’s pointless to drag a dead relationship. We must always try to revive a relationship if there is a slight chance of hope. Happiness in any case is essential but married couples turn their fights into ugly battles and knowing this very well that they are never going to win.
Couples use their children against one another. They treat their children as weapons and destroy their innocent minds forever.
High society never bothers about divorces and separations. Sufferers are from middle class society who never takes courage to break the marriages.
No one is happy to be alone in this world. But when you can not live with peace and dignity with each other then it becomes necessary to think over.
Indian society has injected few things in our minds so badly that females have become over sensitive about divorce. Women have taught to treat their husbands as Gods. They bear violence and blames to keep these marriages intact. Very few take step to move on in life without getting affected.
Mostly family members and friends stop females to take divorce. They treat these females as criminals who are responsible single-handedly for such a fate.
In many cases females become brighter, better and wiser after getting a divorce. When they choose to remarrying a person, females become wiser and more emotionally stable. They can handle the in-laws, the house, petty fights and sensitive situations very well. They know when to start and where to end a battle. Second marriages are more successful in foreign countries. They don’t feel awkward doing this. They give preference to individual’s choice. But in our society we always give preference to society and neighbors and not to our own happiness.
We try to please each and every person and end up losing ourselves completely. Indian politics is not so bad sometimes. Indian families may give complex to these politicians. We don’t seek happiness in our marriages, we seek everything else except happiness.
Indian males may keep girl friends secretly but never try to think about the repercussions and ill effect on their wives. It’s better to continue their marriages or to leave their spouses for better choices. If they can cheat silently, their wives have full right to search for better partners.
If people can cope up with extra marital affairs, they must continue to live with each other but without dragging the issue. It’s your personal choice. No one has a right to teach you against your will. In such cases couples must not blame others. If it is unacceptable in your opinion then it’s better to leave your partner without putting pressure.
After taking the decision, it’s pointless to feel dejected and melancholy. Feeling shattered after a divorce is plain silly. Remember, both of you ejected to save yourself. In fact, your newly-single status today signals the start of a brighter, better, wiser future. You’re absolutely done making compromises. Why to feel dejected and confused after taking a bold step?
Always think twice before leaving a person and try to revive but do not look back after taking a strong decision.
May be some better future partners are waiting for you to be happy ever after. Give a chance to yourself to regain confidence and start a new life. Your children will never suffer to see you happy. You can save them from ugly fights and lost childhood.