Ever wonder how much she bled when she underwent all the mishaps that me or you could not even imagine?..

Being promised of love and vows to be taken and then left alone just after the moment of proof of love given by innocent naive girl?  Were you there as her shoulder , when her heart was abashed? Not being able to even get it through her wit? Losing all faith over faith, humanity & GOD. Was I There?..

Standing alone on street with a child and waiving bye to the husband- who less deserved both of them? Can you or I feel that fear of shivering soul in that cold dark night who dared to save her and her child but then was left alone? Can we..? How she must have felt during that moment?

Daring enough to stand in front of her legally married man for herself and her right of freedom as a human over her thoughts and her body but then being labeled as  kisi or ki “ vaishiya” , “low character”, “neech khandaan” , “kisi or ki  biwi” or mental torture to accompany the abuses. Can you feel her bravery being converted into “ low character woman sleeping with someone else?”

Rising for her right to be educated in front of her conservative society but then ridiculed as “ paida kar ke hi galti kar di” or “ thoda bhut odha diya to sar hi chadh kar beth gyi ”… Can you feel the strength she collected during that whole sleepless night just to speak one line in favor of her dreams or a mere human right- EDUCATION?

What was the mistake of that 16 year old or 22 year old?…. Her clothes?…EXACTLY! that should justify the inhuman rape of 6 month old baby in mono poppy diapers! Can I and you feel her loud cries on denial of APPEAL FOR JUSTICE at the first place (leave the humiliation of the justice process alone), that were being silenced by the family? The society bearing importance of “hum samajik prani he, samaj ke bina nahi reh sakte”

Women who bare it enough innocently for a long time (because that’s how their brains were programmed to become a GOOD “Patni” , “Beti” , “Bhabhi” , “Bahu ” , “Maa” , “nanad” or any other possible CAGE you name it!) but now realizes that they matter too as a human and all women who rather chose to  fight for themselves both…were left alone ultimately in the end. The only difference is in the former one, women are initially decorated with temporary consolidation for the pain they are suffering and acceptance for their efforts for playing their kartvya well, of being a good label , as mentioned above. They are gifted with

“Ro mat, ho gya so ho gya” , “ kismat me jo likha gaya he use kon taal saka he” , “ wpas se nayi zindagi shuru kar, kab tak akhir apne bitey kal ko lekar bethi rahegi” , “beti mard jaat hoti hi esi he, tera koi kasoor nahi he…” , “ akhir tu ladki he, hum aurto ko to banaya hi bardasht karne ke lie jata he, tera koi kasoor nahi he” – the melodious consolidations, the programmed women have always received and will keep on being served with till ages upon being victimized or consumed by men.

However, the later one does not enjoy such gifts! Alas, they are straight away taunted for being brave by those programmed women who never saw anything different but the bowed head of women.

 Now, here comes the real saas bahu serial suspense wala excitement- let’s say someway, somehow, all these women in pain put in all flesh and bones to get out of the trauma, being realistic – not saying that they are completely happy and back to – “OMG! THIS IS THE BEST TIME OF MY LIFE” phase but yes, lets say they somehow managed to muster all the possible motivation and all self help inspiration in the world merely to get out of the trauma and get back to real life, these programmed women, damn!, these programmed women who served the melodious consolidation earlier now brings all the twist to the whole deal and kill Mihir! (Haaye meri Tulsi ka kya hoga ab!) All those people who were then wrapping innocent souls in sympathy- now attack like a new mix breed of an anaconda & king cobra!

Now all of the “ arey beta, sab thik……..” not gradually but suddenly changes to-

“Dekho to zara….kese araam se jee rahi he”, “bikul bhi pachtawaa nahi he ise to..”,” haaye haaye dekho to kse araam se jeene lagi he”

 And incase, God is overwhelmed with prayers of these wounded women and someway miraculously showers a little spring happiness and joy after all the stormy acid rain of pain & these women and warriors find way back to happiness then the programmed ones will open another surgical strike on them! Bombarding-

“haaye haaye, dekho to kaise khush rehne lagi he, akhir  rape hui ladki ese muskuraati he kya?.. zarur isi ki galti rahi hogi!”

 “ haye rey, ksese hasti khelti ghum rahi he haa haa hii hii karti hui , zara nahi socha becharey pati ke barey me, mujh ko to isi ke chaal chalan kharab lagte he..”

 “ akele aurat ek bacche ko paal sakti he bhala?….thoda or she leti auraat jaat to akhir sekhne ke lie hi hi bani he, maa ne zara sehna sikhaya hota, thoda sar jhukna sikhaya hota to aaj us bacche ko baap naseeb hota, akhir daaru piye ya marey ya kisi or aura ke sath rahe, tha iska to pati hi na, thoda she kar nibha leti , par dekho to rone ki jagah or sar utha kr bachhe ko paal rahi he zara pachhtawa nhi he ise to!”

“hum to shuru se hi dekh rahe he..dosto me ghumna firna, maskagiri krna..ye to hona hi tha.. ye ladki itna kuch hone ke bad wpas wahi jeene lagi he, isi ki galti rahi hogi”

 And other words that are beyond my hands to be written.

The whole deal is, even if an injured soul tries sincerely to get up after being nailed down by demons, other women won’t let them get up- “ AURAT HI AURAT KI DUSHAMN BANI HUI HE”…. Kabhi saas ban kar to kabhi nanad ban kar..to kabhi kuch or rishtey ke  label  ke andar..galti akhir kis se nahi hoti?…kya galti karne ke baad use sudhar kar khush rehna jurm he? Ya auraton ka sar utha kar jeena jurm he?…

What hurts the most is that past  the time women are victimized, its not  the other men that are terror to her but the other women who are more harmful to the victim, who is too a women.

“Aurat ho kar bhi wo aurat hi ko maar daal ti he”… kyu?… kyuki shyad unhe bandisho me hi jeena sikhaya gaya tha or ab wo un bandishon ko toot te hue nahi dekh sakti..isilie wo us hur jigar ko khuchalna chahti he jo unke sikhey hue rasamo kasmo ko todna jaanti he.

THERE IS NO WRONG IN STARTING A LIFE AGAIN AFTER A TRAUMA. MY SALUTE TO ALL THOSE WOMEN WHO DARED & RETURNED FROM THE VERGE OF SUICIDE TO GIVE LIFE A SECOND CHANCE.

It was never easy my warriors but you did it! UDAIPUR IS SO PROUD OF ALL SUCH WARRIORS!!

Regardless of what char log talks at your back or on your face, WE NEED YOU TO KNOW THAT YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION.

Let’s not make this already hard life for these females a worsened struggle. If you ever come across any such lady, don’t forget to tell them that they are strong and they are an example of NEVER GIVING UP & TRYING ONCE MORE.

Our small little actions (even through words) can bring a lot of change. It is not easy to lose childhood faith that you have on GOD and it is not easy to restore it either..after it is lost. In our turbulences we have our GOD to pray in front of, with a strange hope and faith that those prayers will be answered. But these warriors who lost their faith don’t even have a GOD to pray from. Just imagine the “mera koi nahi he..” situation….the heart burn it took her to become this sherni with modified restoration of  “mera sirf me hu or mera khuda he”

Author- NEHA SAKKA- THE “UN-CHAINED FEMALE”

Instagram – UN CHAINED FEMALE (NEHA SAKKA)

E-mail id –  togetherwegrowmore@gmail.com